Frustrated

Why is it people always want things to continue and talk about how awesome they are but nobody wants to step up and help? It always seems to fall on the backs of a few.

We are struggling with our Celebrate Recovery ministry for lack of support. We have new people coming in regularly but we haven't established a core group that keeps coming back other than a handful of dedicated people.

We can't seem to get our church family to support us other than lip service. Not all of course, we have some very faithful supporters, but the majority don't seem to want to be involved.

I go to a church with 1500 people so why can't I find someone to offer to volunteer to bring the meal next week? Why does it seem to fall onto the shoulders of 3 of us each week?

We have several pastors on staff yet none visit even once a month to check out what we are doing. I don't expect them there every single week...but once a month? How about once a quarter just stop in and get to know our participants or show that you are behind this ministry?

We have no budget. We rely on volunteers and their generosity. Yet, we seem to have money for other ministries that are more mainstream. I'm sure there are things behind the scenes that I'm unaware of but this is the overall perception.

We can't get people to volunteer to watch the children of the leaders/participants during the 2 1/2 hours we meet. It has been suggested maybe we need to start charging people so we can have paid childcare workers.

So...you want me to go to someone who is desperately trying to turn their life around and doing all they can to make it to the next day and ask them if they don't mind ponying up $10 for childcare? Really?

I know I'm negative right now but I'm so frustrated. We have a leadership meeting next week and I really want to see what the plan is going forward because at this rate, without support, this ministry will go away and I think that would be incredibly sad.

Miracle

You may have seen this making the rounds on the net but this little boy in Haiti was rescued after 7 days, along with his 10 year old sister.

I just love this picture. The news story said he was scared to come out and they brought his mother to the site and she called for him.

Beauty from Ashes

Beauty from ashes. I love that phrase from the Bible. I have seen so many examples in the last few years of God taking something ugly and turning it into something blossoming and beautiful.

Having a lot of down time in the last couple weeks I have sat and thought of how many blessings I have in my life.

I have a husband that loves me beyond measure and that looked passed my ashes and saw beauty. God took that and made our marriage stronger and helped us become whole again. We are coming up on 10 years of being married.

I have 3 children that are healthy. That alone is so much more than many people have.

I have parents that love me even when we don't agree.

I have friends that are there for me when I need them and know when I need to be alone. They cheer with me when I succeed and cry with me when I am hurting.

I have a house we have lovingly made into a home. I can't imagine living anywhere else and I know that one day we may decide to move or need to move but this is our home...even more so than the first house we lived in when we got married.

I am amazed time and time again how God has intervened throughout my life and helped pull me through events...some of my own making and some I had no control over.

It is so easy to get caught up in the ashes of life...the injustices...the failures...but I'm making an effort to see the beauty more.

"Kidney Stones are not fun" or "This Isn't How I Planned my 2010 to Start Off"

I decided to take a couple days off from work right after the New Year to spend some time with the boys and some friends. I took off Monday, January 4th and Tuesday the 5th. The 4th was great fun...me and the boys hit IHOP. We played with Christmas toys. We spent a lot of good time together.

Tuesday the 5th I had made plans to meet a friend at 9AM to do some shopping, eat lunch and possibly see a movie or just hang out until later in the afternoon. I got everybody back off to work/school/daycare and I started to get ready.

My stomach wasn't feeling 100% but I was determined not to let that ruin my Fun Day so I took some medicine then tried to lay down for a bit. Within 15 minutes I was hurting from my belly button all the way around my back. I called my mother and told her I wasn't feeling so great and that I thought I might head into the doctor when they opened up.

I hung up with her and about 10 minutes later at 8AM I decided I needed to go to the ER.

I drove myself and half way there I decided that was a horribly bad idea.

I stumbled into the ER and they took me back and by 8:30 I had broken out in a cold sweat, was vomiting and rocking back and forth on the hospital bed, doing labor breathing. I truly think labor hurt less than this.

The doctor came back and told me he thought based on my symptoms that I had either a ruptured ovarian cyst or kidney stones. His money was on the kidney stones. He had an IV started with pain meds and I have never wanted a needle shoved into my arm more.

By 9AM my Dad was there and my husband on his way and I was in medicated bliss when they took me back for a CAT scan and xrays.

I did indeed have a kidney stone. A large 7 mm football shaped stone that for the next week refused to pass and I ended up having surgery to remove it last Monday.

Got my stent out on Wednesday (I NEVER want a stent in my body ever again) and I'm back at work today feeling a little worn out and beat up but overall in good shape.

If you have ever had a kidney stone you are wincing in pain while reading this. If you have never had one then I assure you that you don't want to experience it.